Gargrave AFC

Grassington 0 – 2 Gargrave

April 2, 2011

Gargrave arrived at Grassington’s ground in a state of confusion, it look different than last time. After five minutes of looking around, it was accepted as fact that Gargrave weren’t playing in Grassington, but Skipton instead.

This revelation caused problems for regular captain Matthew Brennand who couldn’t seem to accept the change of venue – “If they are called Grassington then why don’t they play in Grassington? I don’t want any part of this”; he said angrily.

With the regular captain unable to play, this meant Gargrave were forced into a defensive reshuffle, and a captaincy change.

Despite many valid reservations, Manager Brown decided to give the armband to the weathered veteran Simon Boatwright, who wasted no time in expressing his desires to the squad.

“I want us to go out there and rough them up, if we don’t rough them up then they are going to rough us up, whichever team roughs up the other the best is going to win the game, whats-more if anyone of you doesn’t rough someone up, I’m going to make sure I come over and personally rough you up myself after the game, rough up.”

“That was a Martin Luther King moment”, said a pumped up Andy Seddon.

With the entire squad filled with the fear of being roughed up by captain Simon Boatwright, the game commenced.

Both sides battled hard, and despite Grassington having the better of the possession, they were unable to penetrate the Gargrave back line, possibly through fear of being roughed up.

Ten minutes in and the game was to change, one of Gargrave’s fun sized full backs Al Tudhope suffered an ankle injury, and despite trying to carry on he motioned to captain Boatwright that he would have to go off.

Captain Boatwright was angry.

“Just because you are fun sized doesn’t mean you are above being roughed up, if we lose this game I’m holding you personally responsible and you’ll be on the receiving end of the biggest roughing up of your life.”

But he needn’t have worried as Al Tudhope was replaced at right back by Andy Seddon, who was still pumped up by the captains earlier speech.

And it was down the right hand side that Gargrave’s first goal was created, a long throw by local rodent extermination enforcement officer Matthew Hurst found its way to the feet of Paul “if I were a sheep I’d be a Zwartble” (google it) Wilkin, who delivered a pin point cross onto the ever more shiny head of Richard “I’ll teach your children, as long as the school keep paying me” Orme who made no mistake heading past the keeper, making the score nil one.

Half time quickly arrived with neither team able to take full control of the game, but Gargrave’s slender lead remained intact.

At half time captain Boatwright was less than impressed.

“Why are we only 1 goal up? Before the game I told you we needed to rough them up, I turn around and I see 10 girls on this team, I feel like I’ve been doing the roughing up for all 10 of you and it’s not good enough, you need to show me that you want it as much as me, go out there in the second half and win, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr”

Unfortunately captain Boatwright’s words didn’t have the desired effect, as it was Grassington who started the second half in dominant fashion. They controlled possession and were kept out only by two good saves from Gargrave keeper Adam “Adam Hudson” Hudson.

This didn’t please captain Boatwright, and he decided to do something about it. This something involved a Grassington corner, and some serious roughing up.

As the ball was floated in, captain Simon Boatwright waited until nobody else was watching (absolutely nobody) and roughed up one of the Grassington players, this was a proper roughing up, the sort that nobody had ever seen before.

The stunned Grassington player on the end of the roughing up commented “I feel like I’ve been on the receiving end at an orgy with Mike Tyson, you’re an animal man, an animal.”

This blatant act of roughing up spurred on Gargrave, and a breakaway by Christian “SNOODE” Moon and Ben “I used to score more goals than this” Brown set up Paul “if I were a sheep I’d be a Zwartble” (it’ll catch on) Wilkin, who made no mistake and side footed it past the keeper.

Gargrave played the game out and despite the occasional Grassington chance the defence held firm and the game finished nil two, a welcome three points for Gargrave in their battle for a mid table finish.

The win was however overshadowed by Josh Town claiming the pink unicorn and dancing gorilla had just stolen his car.

Gargrave AFC 0 – 2 Skipton LMS

March 28, 2011

Gargrave met near neighbours Skipton LMS in the Northern Plant Hire Cup on Saturday. The first minutes went all in Gargraves favour though a shot on the break from LMS forced a diving save from keeper Adam Hudson. A free kick from Richard Orme went straight to the opposing keeper. A close range effort from LMS on the half hour mark was enough to give them a slender 1-0 lead.

Minutes into the second half a one on one with the keeper saw a resulting lob find the back of the net to put LMS 2-0 ahead. Paul Wilkins lob went over and Gargrave continued to put on the pressure. A great shot from Orme was parried over the bar. There was little to choose between the two teams but LMS just had the more strength in their attacking play.

Gargrave AFC 1 – 2 Rolls Royce FC

March 20, 2011

Another disappointing day for Gargrave in a performance which deserved a draw at the very least. The hosts made an excellent start when they took the lead three minutes into the game. Paul Wilkin claimed the final header after some good attacking approach play. Rolls looked to be on for an equaliser with a one on one with the keeper but Adam Hudson reacted quickly and averted the threat. Luck was against Gargrave when Rolls  ran through a static defence to level the scores with an easy tap in.

Gargrave continued to attack in  the second half of the game. Paul Wilkin was gifted with an open net after a cross from Ben Brown had skimmed the bar but his shot went over. Richard Orme came close but it was a second defensive error which allowed Rolls to take the lead. Man of the match for Gargrave was substitute Josh Town.

Gargrave hope that luck will be on their side on Saturday when they entertain near neighbours, Skipton LMS in the Northern Plant Hire Trophy game. Kick off 1.30.p.m.

WFC Clitheroe 3 – 2 Gargrave AFC

March 14, 2011

Gargrave made the long journey to Great Harwood to play WFC Clitheroe. The hosts had a 2-0 lead in the first half of play but a half time team talk seemed to do the trick for Gargrave. They were on equal terms in the second half of play, their first goal coming from Ben Brown who neatly chipped the keeper. He was instrumental in the second when his free kick was parried by the keeper to the head of Christian Moon who made no mistake. Gargrave looked the more threatening and were creating more chances but WFC Clitheroe were to score the winning goal on the break with just five minutes of play remaining. Richard Orme was man of the match for Gargrave.

Gargrave AFC 3 – 0 Pendle Athletic

March 5, 2011

Gargrave began the game confidently, the first real shot of the game came from their top scorer Ben Brown who fired into the side netting. An impressive long range throw in from Matthew Brennand found Brown who passed the ball to Paul Wilkin in the box but he failed to convert the chance. Christian Moon shot for goal but the ball went straight to the keeper. There was no mistake on the twenty minute mark when a well taken header from Ben Brown opened the scoring. Good work from defender Matthew Brennand gave Christian Moon the chance for a second goal for the hosts, a good strike from close range. Al Tudhope tried his luck with a diving header but the ball went over the target.

Pendle came out in the second half pushing forwards  but the Gargrave defence held firm with man of the match centre back Dan Thompson thwarting any of their attempts on goal. Gargraves chances to extend their lead were not as frequent as they were in the first half of play but a win always looked on the cards. A good and welcome three points was sealed when Paul Wilkin scored the hosts third goal of the match toward the end of play.

Embsay FC 3 – 2 Gargrave FC

February 28, 2011

Both teams were in agreement to switch the game to the all weather pitch at Sandylands as the Embsay ground was waterlogged.

Gargrave dominated the first half of play and looked comfortable on the all weather surface where they passed the ball well. A Ben Brown free kick opened the scoring and following some good work on the wing a cross found Brown who was left free to deliver into an open net.

The second half saw a total role reversal with Embsay enjoying possession and taking control of the proceedings. They scored three goals to take the lead with no reply from Gargrave.

Barnoldswick Town 4 – 1 Gargrave AFC

February 20, 2011

This was always going to be a difficult fixture for Gargrave but as it drew nearer it became harder still with players on holiday, injured and unwell. Eleven players were available.

Barnoldswick dominated the first half of play and though Hudson in the Gargrave goal made some good saves, the hosts were able to go into the second half with a 3-0 cushion.

Gargrave improved in the second half and created a number of chances but the Barnoldswick defence were quick to act. Ben Brown scored a consolation goal ten minutes from time and it was disappointing when a defensive error gifted Barnoldswick their fourth.

Gargrave 1 – 2 WFC Clitheroe

February 14, 2011

Neither side showed much potential in a lack lustre game with both teams getting off to a slow start. Poor passing let much of the play down. Clitheroe were awarded a penalty for an alleged hand ball but this was well saved by the keeper Adam Hudson.

With a 0-0 scoreline at half time, things could only improve. A well worked solo effort saw Ben Brown score from an acute angle. Clitheroe levelled. Gargrave pushed forwards but to no avail and it was Clitheroe who took the points with a late goal minutes from time. On the teams performances a share of the points would have been a fairer reflection on the game.

Gargrave AFC 3 – 1 Waddington FC

February 6, 2011

Gargrave`s hopes of moving up the Premiership table received a welcome boost on Saturday when they took the full three points from the clash with the visiting club Waddington FC. The game was one of the few to go ahead in the Craven league and despite the torrential rain, both sets of players remarked on how well the playing surface had held up despite the conditions.

A composed pass from Al Tudhope allowed Ben Brown to place a low shot neatly into the back of the net on the two minute mark. Simon Boatwright came close and Paul Wilkin turned and shot from distance but was just wide. Adam Hudson in goal made a brave block from a close range shot from the visitors. A shot from Matt Brown was deflected away from goal after another dangerous cross from Al Tudhope. A powerful free kick from Richard Orme just needed the slightest of touches from man of the match defender Matt Brennand in the goalmouth to glance it into the net but Brennand was just inches away from contact. Ben Brown hit an unstoppable strike to give Gargrave a deserved 2-0 cushion, he almost made it 3-0 but his shot was superbly tipped over the bar by the Waddington keeper . Brown made no mistake moments later when he claimed his hat trick with another great strike.

The hosts kept up the pressure in the second half and always looked comfortable. Simon Boatwright`s crossed shot almost hit the target and Paul Wilkin was close with a long range strike. Waddington scored a consolation goal via a free kick and began to put some pressure on the hosts but the defence held firm allowing Gargrave to claim a well earned victory.

Skipton LMS 3 – 3 Gargrave AFC

January 24, 2011

Bottom of the table Gargrave surprised LMS with their spirited performance and return to form. They took the lead in the first half when Ben Brown scored after a one on one with the LMS keeper. Gargrave continued to push for goal and were denied a bigger lead when two efforts were cleared from the line. The visitors defence held firm giving LMS no clear cut chances.

LMS returned in the second half and gave a stronger performance, scoring a second goal to give them a slender 2-1 lead. Gargrave levelled through defender Matt Brennand with a header from a corner ball. LMS took the lead again but Gargrave pushed forwards and scored to level through Paul Wilkin with five minutes to go. A well deserved point from a good all round team performance with Richard Orme gaining the man of the match award for Gargrave.

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Gargrave AFC